Its Friday, so why not

Now, we've all done it, you wake up one day and its Friday and you were wishing it was  Saturday ( unless you work on Saturdays too which in that case it would suck to be you),but its not Saturday and you have to go to work; unless  you think of a good a excuse..right? So I decided to go online and see what I could find. First, let me tell you that I found some interesting excuses, some  that I have never even heard before.  I also found some that I couldn't even believe were on the list to begin with  and  I also discovered some  real funny ones.  I should  mention that the title of the list is 101 excuses to miss work .

I'm not going to mention all 101 excuses,  but I will  tell you which ones were my favorite.  To better understand why the ones I picked  are my favorites, I will break them down in 3 categories: Interesting, funny and are you serious?

Okay, lets begin:

The interesting excuses:

•  The voices told me to clean the guns today
• I've earned a day off
• I have cramps ( I have never used this one EVER)
• I'm still drunk from last night
• I don't feel up to par ( HA)
• My cat is having kittens and I need to help her
• My washing machine broke and  I have no clean clothes.

The Funny Excuses: 

• My wife's breasts are sore from her breast enlargement so I need to stay home to massage them.
• You can't handle the truth.
• I didn't pay the electricity bill, so I can't see to get ready.
• My wife says shes going to conceive( Yes conceive , this is what makes it funny) today and I want to be there went it happens
• I won't be in today, I'm calling in dead
• I'm sick with the lack of ambition
• My water bed busted and my room is flooded

The "Are you serious?" Excuses:

• My daughter ran away and I should stay home in case she comes back
• My shrink put me on a new depressant yesterday and I'm feeling a little weird
• If I tell  you why I can't come in I would have to kill you
• My cat was alarmed by my sleep-talking, jumped off the bed, knocked my alarm off the dresser, of which the batteries fell out ; so I overslept
•  I need a mental recovery day
• I'll be stalking my previous boss who fired me for not showing up to work
• I was up all weekend with this new girl/guy I met and I didn't get any sleep.. if you know what I mean

So there you have it. You're welcome!